Saturday, November 14, 2015

being still


It doesn't need repeating, but I will say it anyway: We are constantly on the move.

We live in a time and era that expects 110% productivity out of us at all times without breaks. My life could be a prime example: working through residency, doing 28hr shift every 4 days, trying to catch up on life and manage the resulting chaos on my days off (when I should be relaxing), all the time praying to God to keep me sane and that nothing crashes and burns in the process.

But who said that's a bad thing? It is definitely a good thing to stay busy and live a productive life. But there is definitely a balance. From experience, I have realized that this life-in-the-fast-lane mentality becomes a problem when we never slow down to live in the present.

Have you ever been called a workaholic? Do you have an always-on-the-go schedule? Does your life seem to continually pass you by in a blur?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then chances are that you have fallen victim to productiv-itis.

I am making fun of the situation, but it's true!

Everything you might be involved with may be a positive and worthwhile investment of your time, however, it is so important to slow down at times just so that you have a chance to appreciate your surroundings and reflect on what is happening to you. This is so that you have time to mentally go through the process of reprioritizing, changing things that need to be changed, healing, restoration, strengthening. Slowing down also gives us a chance to pause and thank God for his provision and guidance through it all.

And slowing down is easier said than done: When we never slow down, we frequently get used to life in the fast lane to the point that we are uncomfortable with being still, undistracted, and in the moment. Have you ever been hit all of the sudden with a moment of stillness? Sometimes these "stillness" moments are planned: a nice slow walk in the neighborhood, or a planned dinner for two, but sometimes they come out of nowhere. Just to be honest, if you are like me, you probably don't like being still at all and when these moments happen unexpectedly where you are forced to be still, you probably get all anxious. WHen these moments hit, I feel the need to fill the void with something productive. It's as if I had let my schedule down because I wasn't able to be efficient enough to fill it to the brim with useful things to do.

I laugh when I think about this, because most of the time I find myself praying to God to slow my life down a bit because I am tired of feeling like I am stuck in a hamster wheel. My life passing by at 100 miles per hour day after day. But then a moment of quiet comes and then instead of feeling peaceful, I feel anxious to get more things done.

Because of this, I knew there was a problem. This is why I decided to make a strong effort to be still on a regular basis. Because of my hectic schedule, the only time that I have to take a deep breath and take in my surroundings is when I wake up 15 minutes early and make time to reflect and spend time with God before I leave for work.

Before I started, I hoped that this butt-early morning quiet time would make an impact on the way I carry myself the other 99.9% of the time when I'm in the fast lane at work or wherever. I can see now that for sure it has helped me feel more at peace, content in life, and has helped me connect better with God. Overall, I realize that I've needed these moments of quiet all along. Where before I was just barely surviving, now I have made time to stop, breathe and reflect on how good God is to me and because of it, I am one step closer to living life to the fullest.

Jesus definitely lived life in the fast lane, but he also made tome for stillness. As I read his life story, I can imagine that with everyone following him from town to town, he must have been exhausted. People expecting 110% productivity from him at all times because they were so needy. But even with all the sick people he had yet to heal and all the things he had yet to teach about, he would frequently go up into the mountains to be with his father and pray.  He probably chose to go up into the mountains because that was where there was no cell phone signal and he could find solitude. He would make room for the stillness and quiet moments in which he could reflect and be undistracted by anything else. I think he took these hikes alone because he knew that he NEEDED these moments of quiet. Then once rejuvenated and recharged he was able to come down from the mountain and once again be fully present in his ministry with the people.

If Jesus needed at times to be still and reflect and pray, then maybe we are no different?

As for me, I'm just hoping the morning routine continues to hold up.